The Funny Bone
Information
Please post jokes, funny stories, and anything humorous. It is healthy for our minds, bodies, and spirits. Very healing. So let's get those endorphins swimming around, and keep it clean.
Website: http://transplantcafe.com/group/funnybone
Members: 77
Latest Activity: 6 hours ago
Cartoon by Jay Robare
. Please remember this is for everyone, and everyone must enjoy it. So keep it clean. Thanks. : )
Discussion Forum
Mrs. Murphy
Started by Lili Feldman. Last reply by Michelle French Jan 17, 2011. 7 Replies 1 Like
Six retired Irishman were playing poker in O"Leary's apartment when Paddy Murphy loses 500on a single hand, clutches his chest , and drops dead. Showing respect for their fallen brother, the other…Continue
How I Learned To Mind My Own Business
Started by Debbie Shoemaker. Last reply by Maggie Velez Dec 16, 2010. 5 Replies 4 Likes
I was walking past the mental hospital the other day,And all the patients were shouting, '13.....13....13.'The fence was too high to see over, butI saw a little gap in the planks, so I looked through…Continue
Dial 9
Started by Diane Burke, Kidney 03. Last reply by Demetrios Nov 19, 2010. 5 Replies 2 Likes
Last week, a woman on a business trip checked into the Four Seasons in Palm Beach and was a bit lonely. she thought, "I'll call one of those men you see advertised in phone book for escorts…Continue
Thankful elephant
Started by Jeffrey C. Cabrera. Last reply by Debbie Shoemaker Oct 22, 2010. 5 Replies 2 Likes
A man was on safari in Africa. While walking through the bush he came apon an elephant in apparent distress. He locked eyes with the elephant and realized the elephant did not want to hurt him and…Continue
Circumcision
Started by David Goodman. Last reply by Tina Sammon Apr 14, 2010. 4 Replies 1 Like
Jays story reminds me of another similar joke. Two mohels (they perform ritual circumcisions) are discussing what they do with the foreskins they remove. The first says he buries them outside the…Continue
The Colonoscopy
Started by Lili Feldman. Last reply by Sue R. Dec 25, 2010. 2 Replies 1 Like
This is funny!ABOUT THE WRITERDave Barry is a Pulitzer Prize-winning humor columnist for the Miami Herald.Colonoscopy Journal:I called my friend Andy Sable, a gastroenterologist, to make an…Continue
Comment Wall
Comment
-
Comment by Lili Feldman 6 hours ago -
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it
was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even
though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the
teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was
physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".
The teacher asked, " What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him."
-
TC Admin Comment by Karen Weddick yesterday -
Oh my Lili, were you up all night again??? You're on another roll, thanks for the laughs. Keep'em coming!
-
Comment by Lili Feldman yesterday
-
Q: Why is it OK for blondes to catch cold?
A: They don't have to worry about blowing their brains out.
-
Comment by Lili Feldman yesterday
-
What do smart blondes and UFOs have in common? You always hear about them but never see any!
-
Comment by Lili Feldman yesterday
-
Yo mama so fat when she steps on a scale, it read "one at a time, please"
-
Comment by David Goodman yesterday -
Good ones, Lili!
-
TC Admin Comment by Karen Weddick yesterday -
I loved the old lady joke, that was great. I will share these. Enjoyed them both. Thanks for the laughs Lili.
-
Comment by Lili Feldman on Sunday
-
A man walks into a packed pub and shouts "Drinks are on me!"
So the bartender gives every one a drink and says to the man "that'll be $96 please"
The man looking puzzled says "I havn't got any money." So the infuriated bartender leaps over the bar and kicks the crap out of the man.
The next day the man walks back into the pub and shouts "Drinks are all on me!" then turns to the bartender and says "You're not having one, you get nasty after one drink".
-
Comment by Lili Feldman on Sunday
-
Defense Attorney: Will you please state your age?
Old Lady: I am 94 years old.
Defense Attorney: Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened the night of April 1st?
Old Lady: There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front porch on a warm spring evening, when a young man comes creeping up on the porch and sat down beside me.
Defense Attorney: Did you know him?
Old Lady: No, but he sure was friendly.
Defense Attorney: What happened after he sat down?
Old Lady: He started to rub my thigh.
Defense Attorney: Did you stop him?
Old Lady: No, I didn't stop him.
Defense Attorney: Why not?
Little Old Lady: It felt good. Nobody had done that since my Albert died some 30 years ago.
Defense Attorney: What happened next?
Old Lady: He began to rub all over of my body.
Defense Attorney: Did you stop him then?
Old Lady: No, I did not stop him.
Defense Attorney: Why not?
Old Lady: His rubbing made me feel all alive and excited. I haven't felt that good in years!
Defense Attorney: What happened next?
Old Lady: Well, by then, I was feeling so "spicy" that I just laid down and told him 'Take me, young man. Take me now! '
Defense Attorney: Did he take you?
Old Lady: Hell, no! He just yelled, "April Fool!"
And that's when I shot him, the little bastard.
-
Comment by David Goodman on Thursday
-
Love that last one, Lili!
not a member yet?
Photos
Latest Activity
Lili Feldman commented on Lili Feldman's group The Funny Bone"A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said itwas physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because eventhough it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was…"
Lili Feldman commented on Jay Robare's group Inspirational Stories"Appropriate Attire
One Sunday morning an old cowboy entered a church just before services were to begin. Although the old man and his clothes were spotlessly clean, he wore jeans, a denim shirt and boots that were very worn and ragged. In his hand…"
Walter s replied to Tai's discussion eating shellfish post transplant"I ate shrimp before but I stopped because I wasn't sure .. I was wondering the same thing because my favorite food is lobster and steamers :/"
Lili Feldman commented on Lili Feldman's group The Funny Bone"A man walks into a packed pub and shouts "Drinks are on me!"So the bartender gives every one a drink and says to the man "that'll be $96 please"The man looking puzzled says "I havn't got any money." So the…"
Lili Feldman commented on Lili Feldman's group The Funny Bone"Defense Attorney: Will you please state your age? Old Lady: I am 94 years old. Defense Attorney: Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened the night of April 1st? Old Lady: There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front…"
Daniel Larby posted a status"i had a liver transplant in 2007 im doing really well. hows everyone else doing sincee there transplants?"
respond to member blogs:
discussions need your input:
Birthdays
Birthdays Today
Birthdays Tomorrow
quick links!
follow transplant cafe:
 |
 |
 |
Meet Members by Transplant Type
Badge
© 2013 Created by TransplantCafe.com.
You need to be a member of The Funny Bone to add comments!